by Scott
Rainbow Connection?
Jan 24, 2012 at 7:03 pm in All Things Bear, Petrie Dish, Rants by Scott
The colors of the “Bear Pride” flag, which was designed by Craig Byrnes in 1996, are said to represent the fur colors and nationalities of bears throughout the world. It was designed with inclusiveness in mind.
So why isn’t our community as colorful as our flag?
This topic came up in conversation a couple of weeks back; and a comment posted on one of my recent blog rants here on BearCentral reignited the topic.
For a community that boasts diversity and acceptance as bricks in the cornerstone of its foundation, why are we so lacking in the “diversity” area as it relates to ethnicity?
I once dated this really gorgeous, super hairy little nugget, when I lived in San Francisco. He was adorable, sweet and smart. We spent some quality time together, had some dynamite sex, and… I thought things were going fine, until he confessed to me that, although he liked me and enjoyed spending time with me, he wouldn’t be seeing me anymore; except as friends.
Why? Because, he said, he was more attracted to black men.
I felt like Reese Witherspoon, in the movie, “Legally Blonde”.
“So… you’re breaking up with me because I’m too…. white???”
Commiserating with a friend a few days later, I was told, “Yeah… we were all surprised he went out with you in the first place. He’s into Chocolate Bears.”
I can be a lot of things; but (especially with my Scottish/Irish genes) chocolate isn’t one of them. 
We wrestled with the topic of ethnic diversity often, at the magazines where I worked.
Even today, with both (The Original) Bear Magazine and 100% BEEF out of print, critics could argue that both publications (both on their own, and as erotic microcosms of the Bear Community) seemed very “white”.
I remember the criticisms well:
“Where are the African-American Bears?”
“Where are the Asian Bears?”
“Where are the Latino Bears?”
Our response was usually “Good Question!!!”
Men of all shapes, sizes, ages and races were welcome at (The Original) Bear and 100% BEEF Magazine. But bears of color seemed, by and large, uninterested in appearing in print.
As editor, I actually featured the first African American man on the cover of (The Original) Bear Magazine. That was almost 15 years ago, but I remember it well.
It was Issue #58. His name was “Oz” and – damn – he was a thick, handsome, bearded hunk. Woof.
But…. Issue #58???
Seriously.
For 57 Issues before that, the cover models were largely Caucasian.
Modeling for a magazine was a little bit like enlisting in the army; you did it of your own free will, and you didn’t get paid enough for your time and, well… <ahem!> exposure. We did extensive model searches, but models had to be willing (and, hopefully, excited!) to do a photo shoot.
Even though we wanted to increase the ethnic diversity of our pages, we couldn’t exactly force unwilling people into dropping their pants and “getting it up” for our photographers, right?
Because we got very few applications to model from racial minorities, I always tried to find other ways to showcase bears of color in the magazine; in our “Road Trip” pages (photos from events, fundraisers and bear runs) and art/photography gallery features.
Even with that effort, ethnic diversity still seemed lacking on our pages.
Walt and I were talking about this topic last week, as well; he was telling me how he and Chris face similar challenges at Pantheon Productions and Pantheon Bear – they just don’t get enough beautiful, burly men of color for their website(s) and video productions.
They, too, would like to see that change.
Of course, magazines and videos aren’t the only places where ethnic diversity seems sorely lacking in the bear community.
Take a look around the pool at Lazy Bear Weekend, or gaze across the Boatslip in between Planter’s Punches, during the tea dance at Ptown Bear Week.
The Bear Pride Flag - Designed by Craig Byrnes
Why are there, relatively speaking, so few bears of color in the crowd?
I can’t answer this. But I would love to hear what you guys think.
Do we in the bear community unknowingly discriminate against men of color, making them feel unwelcome?
Or, are there cultural, religious and/or other factors at play, preventing more men of color from wanting to jump into the bear pool?
What do you guys think?
Cool Blog Scott.
First off, I think the Bear community has started to become alot more picky about who is a so-called bear and who isn’t, ever since being a bear pretty much became a cool thing to be. In the start of it, people weren’t trying to be “bear” in anyway. You either were or you weren’t. But with all things that become somewhat popular, you tend to get the % of those who don’t really fit the mold but would and will do anything to look like they have been made from that mold. If the “bear ship” starts to get too overloaded…lets face it… some of the 1st ones on it are not going to be too pleased and might even jump overbored. Yes, ALL are welcome, but that doesn’t make ALL a bear.
Second, my personal take on why we don’t see many Black bears, Latino bears or Asian bears is because so few of them actually exsist. To me, as most of you know, bear is hair….and its a rare blue moon day when you actually see a Furry or Hairy Black, Latino and esp Asian man. Weather it be in person or online porn, they are very few and far between in my experiance. There are some out there for sure but compaired to the white mutts coming from such backgrounds as Irish, German, Sweedish, British, Eurpoean, etc…that seem to swamp the communtiy, the minoritys seem to get lost in the crowd.
I have to agree with you. It may not be unconscious discrimination, but just the fact that hairy, burly guys who would fit the image “bear” in minority groups seem to be rare.
I think there are plenty of hairy minorities, I also think they might be a little more reserved and less prone to post online or be photographed for a magazine spread. It might be a cultural thing, it also might just be smart.
I agree. There are plenty of hairy minorities. Actually, a LOT of the hairier guys that I know in the bear community would be considered a “minority” here in the US!!! Middle Eastern, Spanish, some Latinos, Russian, Greek… Good point that sometimes it CAN be a cultural thing to decide to pose naked or decide that your looks have some sort of “value” in the community. Good point!
By the way, I find that ex-football player Wood, to be smokin’ HOT in his pictures.
You should see his solo video. So HOT!
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR RAISING THESE QUESTIONS!! As a young member of the “bear community” (whatever that is) i have not only noticed asked questions about the identity and resulting community of “Bear,” but more often find that i have ideological and personal problems with the race, age, and gender is treated within this community.
As a person of color it is apparent to me, the lack of racial diversity in the VISUAL bear community. I think this can be somewhat accounted for the fact that in our culture whiteness, not only in color but lifestyle and beliefs is seen as the normative standard and expectation for behavior, in a similar way that heterosexual, monogamous relationships are seen as the model of all relationships/sexual interactions in our culture. I can also say that i feel very isolated an unsafe when a man i don’t know refers to me as a”brown bear, Latin boy” or any other label that presupposes or reduces my identity to that of an assumed ethnicity. I think this may be tied to the lack of representation of people in color within the Bear community, in that, because when one is a minority within this community, there is a lot of pressure and expectation on people of color to embody blackness, brown-nes, asian-nes, etc, and often times, that racial or ethnic identity can be so sexualized by another person, that they fail to see you as a sexual, emotional person, and simply as a black person, native person etc. i am not arguing for “color-blindness” that is even worse, I simply think that to expect any sort of behavior, attitude or sexuality based on ones ethnicity is discrediting to other aspects of that persons identity.
This has been true in my case at least, and those assumptions and expectations are NOT appreciated.
Thank you again for posing this question, these uncomfortable questions and discussions are the only way to ensure we are consciously moving towards true inclusivity in the Bear community. Please feel free to respond or contact me for further discussion!
I agree, Marcos. Assumptions and expectations, the lack of diversity in the visual bear community, etc. Interesting what you have to say about representation and having to embody your “brownness”. I’d like to hear more about what you have to say, I’m surprised no one responded sooner.
It’s an interesting topic of discussion. My partner Les (one of the models on the front screen. The beefy furry one with the thick black beard) has asked the same question. He is multi-racial (Arab, Italian, Greek, Haitian) and has his own concerns about the dearth of ethnic bears in the bear community.
My sentiments are much like Johnny’s previous comment. The community (including it’s flag!) is initially & loosely-based on abundance of body hair which does “leave out” some ethnicities where hirsuteness is not as common (most notably Black, Asian, and some Latino Bears). Media companies are not in the business to promote diversity. They are in the business to make money, so it is in the best interest to cater to the lowest common denominator of what people want on the shallowest level (and you can’t get more shallow than porn!) They have just as much right to sell whatever they want as you do to support them or not.
Frankly, it was refreshing when Bear Magazine or American Bear showed us some less stereotypical bears and bears of color, but it usually came at a price for them to do so. Which is unfortunate.
However, in the real world, I think it plays out a little more evenly. I know plenty of black bears, Asian bears, and not-furry bears (like me!) who chose to see themselves as unique and niche. I LOVE the fact that I don’t have to compete to be the furriest, or the beefiest, or have the best beard, because I get to be the target of attention all on my own for the MANY, MANY bears that are not into other bears.
I used to wish I was furry, but I had the choice to either see myself a victim because I was in the minority of what the majority liked, OR let it empower me to prove to the world (and myself) that being a bear means more than taking your shirt off at the Lone Star and being pawed at. WAY WAY more….
I chose the latter. Self-esteem comes from SELF. Not from what everyone else thinks of you. Be exactly who you are and be proud! Own it. And people will see that and be more attracted to that.
After all, the fur is just a calling card. It’s what happens AFTER the introduction, that makes all the difference.
That’s my 3 cents!
– Jeff
Very nice Jeff! …and its good to see one of the models on the homepage is an actually member. Huggers Bud
Amen, Jeff.
Great to hear your perspectives here. I agree with your points 100%, except the one about the shallowness of porn.
I’m contractually obligated to dispute that point, of course. LOL
Seriously, though… porn is sometimes an easy target. But, we shouldn’t forget that (The Original) Bear, a porn magazine, helped to launch the bear identity and solidify bearish masculine ideals and sensibilities as we know them today. In doing so, it started a gay cultural revolution of sorts, which challenged society’s definitions of beauty and sexiness.
Shallowness may exist in the larger porn world, but the roots of bear porn, even today, are ingrained with that profound challenge against greater society’s notion of “What is sexy?”
With nearly every magazine I published, I got letters of thanks from guys around the world, thanking me for playing a part in helping them to feel better about themselves, by celebrating the beauty in natural, hairy, stocky men.
I featured guys on the covers of magazines who, 10 years earlier, were embarrassed about taking their shirts off in public because of the negative attention they felt their hairy backs, shoulders, chests and round bellies drew.
I always thought, to facilitate liberation like that is pretty profound. I’m sure you’ll agree there’s nothing shallow about that.
Hey Scott!
I apologize. I should have been more clear that by “shallow”, I simply meant that you’re enjoying what someone looks like without context. I didn’t mean that those that post or sell smut were shallow people. I meant that people are consuming the media (ahem) strictly based upon looks alone. The shallowness was on the part of the consumer whose enjoying a nice 2-D image without context as to who the person is or what they sound like or what kinda work they do, or whatever fantasy they want to make up in their head!
Well said Jeff & Scott!
So here’s my rant . . .
Have you ever said, “I just love Black guys!”?? Just what do you mean by that?? As a black guy, I find that insulting. All black guys are not created equal (but then, neither are white guys, Asian guys, Latino guys, etc.). Please take a moment to look deeper than my skin color. Please embrace me for what’s between my ears, not just what’s between my legs. Please consider how you’d feel if the situation were reversed.
(Climbs down from soapbox . . .)
Agreed!
Agreed! Very well said… We just saw a re-run of the episode of “30 Rock” where Liz goes on a date with a black guy (played by Wayne Brady). It was pretty funny and plays on the whole, “We are not all the same!!!” theme!
(scott knows how to fluff furr around here)
I just returned from Brazil and must say brown and black bears are not a minority… location, location, location!
Very good point.
In relative terms, when considering the bear population in the United States, bears of color *are* a minority. I agree, location, location, location — but I don’t plan on moving to Brazil any time soon. I was born in the US and love it here, it’s home. Maybe some Brazilian bears need to come here!
This should flip you boat, it did mine.
I’ve been told I’m NOT a bear. (Not by anyone on this site)
Why? Am I lacking fur? NO.
Am I lacking facial hair? NO.
Am I lacking size? Oh please!
It’s because I’m blonde. (Or at least was blonde
)
I didn’t fit this ass’s image of what he thought a “Bear” is. No dark hair or dark beard. No round belly. No flannel shirt. I didn’t fit his CLONE mindset
I thought what a moron this guy is. It did make me wonder how many guys do think this way.
LOL That’s great. And that’s exactly why nobody gets to say “Who is a bear” and “Who isn’t”, because even guys who think they’re covered in all of the areas might fall short in somebody else’s narrow, preconceived list of what a bear is, and then they’re “out”. And suddenly they feel the sting of discrimination and exclusion which they’ve repeatedly thrust upon the people who they, themselves may have excluded for similar reasons, on another occasion.
Frank – from what I can see – you’re ALL bear.
Agree…. and a very sexy one at that!
GRROOOF!!
I wasn’t fishing but Thanks Gentlemen!
Interesting perspective, Frank. To some extent “Bear” is an attitude. I think it is–or should be–about openness, inclusion, and acceptance whether you’re blonde, lack the copious body hair, or your size is different than the “baseline”. I’m glad you posted, this really helps–I hate when other guys say “he’s not a bear, he’s not [insert favorite limitation here] enough”. Who died and made them king or queen of what bear is and isn’t?
As a man of color and a proud supporter of the bear community, I have experienced situations that might discourage other men of color. When subjectivity plays a role in forums, sites, publications, events and social activities, a sense of discrimination looms in its presence. For instance, a lot of profiles would read: “…white men only… sorry, just a preference…” – which is absolutely the right of the individual. However, for some, such a statement immediately eliminates the possibility of meeting a person who just might be one of the best people anyone can come in contact with; personally, I find it disappointing.
When the color of someone’s skin determines their worth, it reflects ideologies of times in the past that created overwhelming divisions. Separatists lend to the concepts of lesser forms of discrimination. For the bear community, one that supposedly embraces genuine diversity, such mentalities cause underlying threads of hypocrisy… sad, but true. If attitudes and behaviors could adjust to meet the original idea of the bear community, I believe, more men of color would be better inclined to participate.
I was raised a pluralist by interracial parents; living with that mentality is an aspect of my life I will forever cherish. BTW, I am Black, German, Irish, and Cherokee – a “cultured mutt,” if you will.
Huge furry [pluralistic] Hugs, to Everyone!
hey Grizzly – LOVE your comment – all thumbs (and legs
) up!!! … BTW, I miss you !!! 
xoxo
Amen, Michael!
My friend Keith is black, a bear, and bear through and through, likes hot sex with men of similar stripe and develops long, loving and nurturing relationships with man friends. It is so wrong to say black and mean all blacks, just like Raymond says. If you live, work and play with blacks and whites, latinos and asians, you will soon discover each has their own personality and saying “black” like that is a shallow well, shallow as hell. My BF has never lived or known any blacks as close friends and he is paranoid based upon these stereotypes. I love my black friends and white friends alike and I hope to introduce my BF to Keith one day. He will discover one of the sweetest people I know, even if he is a 6’2″ 250 lb galloot with hands the size of a notebook who wants me out of my pants! I definately want him out of his:) LOL
Well it seems we all have our own points of view, as to what makes a bear. I think the first thing to being a “Bear” is more of a state of mind, then it is to ones size, hirsuteness, fashion, or color of skin. Because when the Bear movement started it was because another group of gay men thought that we didn’t fit in because of our size, or hairiness, or sense of fashion or skin color. It seems that we are now slipping down that same slope as our detractors.
I recently spent 5 wonderful days at a guesthouse in Fort Lauderdale catering to Bears and was the only guest of color, initially I thought the only reason I was welcomed was the color of my money not my skin tone. After 2 days it was apparent that they were interested in me as a person not as a Black Bear. They were interested in my existence as a Floridian transplant in DC. Our lack of visibility in the Bear community bespeaks the lack of mobility in American culture as well. I decided last year to be a gate crasher whenever the opportunity arises. I’m rather late to the party to begin with and as I interact with other Bears I don’t gravitate to those who look like me as much as I gravitate towards men of decency. Perhaps it’s the environment that I’m in that’s inclusive but I am not suprised to find men of color shying away from being flavor of the moment. The question should probably be “Have I/We made the effort to reach out to those different from me?”
I see a lot, a LOT of assumptions, generalizations and even some shades of racism in this post. There are several sociological/environmental markers which could be measured in determining why one doesn’t see more ‘men of color’ in the bear community. And let’s face it, by men of color you’re referring to black men while failing to really recognize the absence of Asians, Latinos, Hispanics, Indians, et all. . They’re there, but there are many factors involved in why you don’t see them crawling all over the place or being as visible and/or uninhibited about posting on bear sites or modeling for magazines and porn. This has little to nothing to do with racism. Here in New York City there are at least three African American bear groups which come to mind, one even openly discriminates against non-black men from attending their functions (which is their choice of course).
While I appreciate your sentiments and willingness to discuss the issue, your point smacks of one more finger pointed in the direction of generalizing the white or non-African American community by suggesting it bares blame for maligning a minority…a suggestion and assumption which is neither true or fair and, a tired, worn-out argument that African Americans are still somehow shunned in the gay community as a whole.
Are you referring specifically to the blog itself, or to the comments, in general?
Just my two pennys worth but perhaps bears of colour find it harder to be out in their communities as there can be a lot more homophobia in those communities than white ones. To put your pic on the front of a gay magazine leaves it out there in the public realm forever.
That is a very good point. I can totally see that here living in Canada too. East Indian, Middle Eastern, and Chinese for example can be very, very hard on their own peeps in this context. Too bad, because there are so many lovely and good looking hairy and non hairy men of colour in this world and I can understand the hesitation of even coming out in these communities, the consequences can be deadly, literally.
Speaking from experience. The Northeast Ursamen are cold, cliquey and unwelcoming of men of color.
Keith – I just messaged a good buddy of mine who happens to be a part if the Northeast Ursamen group… I’ve been to a few of their parties and while it’s been a few years back, remember at least three black men who were both active and I believe officers in the organization. My friend also tells me they have African American members as well as Latinos, so while I’m not sure of how cold or cliquey they may be (and i wouldn’t doubt it) the claim of them being unwelcoming to men of color sounds completely false to me. Are you sure that isn’t based on something else? Perhaps a falling out? To charge racism is a serious thing and should be considered among the most repugnant social injustices in our society; yet to make the charge against someone or a group who is innocent of it, I find to be particularly unfair and loathsome.
Wow Jake…not that I know any of the players but I’m always fascinated by persons who aren’t of color telling anyone that they feel things wrong, or that they couldn’t possibly have felt racially discriminated against. The idea that my friends can’t be racist as I’m not racist is a good idea but that’s all it is. EVERYONE has some prejudices, some don’t like tall, thin, blonde, fat, old…whatever. We in the “bear” community have this conceit that we are “double minorities” and therefore immune to our prejudging is entirely false.
We’d like to think that we’re above all our differences but we instead of trying to work for change and help ourselves overcome our preconceptions, tell whomever that they are being “too sensitive”
I posted an update recently as I have grown tired of being called a “chocolate” any thing…well actually I’m not fond of being called much beyond my name usually. But the point was that it’s kind of demeaning to be reduced to a thing…sure I enjoy attention but you should want to know me, if my blackness gets me in the door my “me-ness” should make you ask me to stay.
Of course that’s my opinion, you who don’t live life as an out person of color feel free to judge
thank you eric. my thoughts exactly
I’ve had a great deal of discrimination because my appearance is not “anglo” enough, I personally feel like an odd duck at gay bars and camps, I think this holds true whether the bar or camp is gay or has a bear subculture focus. Online I have guys sometimes tell me I’m attractive but the reception in person at bars and clubs is cold and unwelcoming. All my life I’ve felt out of place among the straight world and to find myself discriminated against and unacknowledged by my gay peers… it’s devastating. I have tried reaching out to the bear community in my tiny city that has more of a small town feel than anything with beautiful rural countryside very few miles from the “city’s” downtown area only to find there are key stakeholders in my small community that hold the “keys” to the bear events. Unfortunately the gatekeepers are a bear and chaser couple, the chaser part of that couple hated me on sight – maybe because he saw me as a threat? All I can say is I can’t escape this power couple at any bear or gay community event. Going to gay camp nearby here in northeastern PA is intimidating – I’ve tried and, again, the environment is not welcoming. I remember going to Hillside Campground for Illumination weekend. I skulked around for a few hours checking out the beautiful luminarias. It was gorgeous but I remember feeling very alone. When I did interact with the registration staff at the camp I felt like a criminal and like all eyes were on me. I didn’t feel welcome or part of the community – it was like I was a visitor in a foreign place without a tour guide. I feel like a gay campground, gay venues in general, should be like coming home. The best experiences I’ve had with feeling welcome have been when individuals shook my hand and made eye contact, made an effort to orient me and respond positively to my efforts to greet them and smile in a friendly way. This type of welcome was not something I’ve found in the gay or bear community. Granted, this may have something to do with my own issues surrounding Latino culture, machismo/hypermasculinism, and how this and I fit in with/to being gay and identifying with and being attracted to bears. Clearly there is a push to be lighter/fairer-skinned with blue eyes and blonde hair. I don’t think this is unique to gay men or bears. I think this is universal. The fact that I don’t fit that–I don’t come anywhere near fitting that–puts me at a distinct disadvantage at baseline. So I fight with accepting and loving myself as I am and wishing what I look like and what my background is came with some of the perks of white skin/blue-eyed/blonde-haired “beauty” privilege.
If you’ve read Toni Morrison’s The Bluest Eye you know the desctructive capacity inherent in trying to be something you’re not–in The Bluest Eye, Pecola, a dark-skinned, brown-eyed character, wishes for blue eyes that might somehow help here escape her station and circumstances in life. There is a system of socioeconomic disadvantage and disparity, not just in the bear community but universally. There is a history of a predominant culture driven by white males, I don’t think this has changed or will change just because we happen to be gay bears. The system and being raised/steeped within it ensures that it applies even in the bear community.
So why don’t you see me at bear events… from the above I guess I can sum it up best this way for myself: 1. I literally don’t see myself there–and by myself I mean anyone with dark features – brown hair and eyes, “olive complexion” whatever *that* means lol. 2. I have a history of feeling uncomfortable at baseline with my sexuality and how it fits with my cultural and religious background. I’m not sure if other men of color feel this way, but in Latino culture traditionally macho on the verge of barbarism is perceived as “normal”. Religiously I was taught to hate myself. Both of these things make it very difficult to get the nerve up to go to a gay or bear event without –> 3. Not being actively welcomed or feeling a strong sense of a warm and open community out there for me as a Latino gay bear.
It really is easier to sit at home watching Netflix under the covers. I’m looking into Chumley’s bear cruise as a way to enjoy more social interaction with the “predominant” bear culture while having a really sweet vacation. If I get no love on the cruise at least I’ll enjoy the food and activities and the view/sites. LOL
I really have tried… I’ve reached out and my own hangups/history and the lack of a welcoming environment invariably makes it not enough for me to overcome all of it to feel I can participate and be comfortable and a real part of a community I’m just not part of by definition. Maybe the definitions need to change, I’m not sure. Maybe inclusion and the beautiful colors of the bear flag need to be more than just there for show, more than just a superficial gesture signifying “inclusiveness” and “diversity”. Moving from tacit but effectively artificial/false inclusion to a more open, deliberate sense of community that incorporates/has room for us all – made up of intelligent, articulate, and mature/enlightened men that love each other because of and in spite of our differences.
I’m willing to “take the leap” and help build bridges/contribute in kind to what I fondly feel is my community if I know someone who genuinely wants me to be there is there and ready to “catch” me. In fact, I’ve been waiting the better part of my adult life for a place, for caring and loving people that are like me, to call home.
Dude. Your a wreck. I am sorry you feel powerless. Thats what the bitches want to hear. Get a backbone and find your place in this world. Get a shrink. Get some friends. Try a new cola? Break out of your world. What is “olive skin?” Who cares? I don’t. I care when a person is an asshole to me. Then we have problems.
You need to stand up bubba. Love your self. No one will otherwise. Education is a wonderful way to meet people and grow a new world. Fuck your local “gay community leaders” bunch of mean coke heads and bitches with shitty lives. You are more than that. Fuck them. They want you to feel less than. I know the type all so well.
Maybe a bigger city or a change is needed. Word of advice. I have found “gay destinations” a disaster for long term living. Often the same fags with the same drama. I always love to visit Palm Springs, but I am ready to leave after a week or two. I left a husband there once. I hope him, the new boyfriend and the drugs are treating them well. Lol. Boys beware.
Fear is self feeding. Then starve the damn beast and kill it. That sounds so manly and way cool.
Damn Dan, you’re attitude sucks! Looks like you could use a little healing yourself, or a quilt making class with the Quackers. : )
Cliff note: A Fag is a measure of wood once used to murder homosexuals and witches by burning at the stake.
Big bear hugs to Marc!!!
Thanks for the bear hugs, Cliff! I also saw your comment about Brazil… I’ll have to visit some time. Seems like you had a nice time over there.
Yeah… it’s an unfair assessment to characterize gay community leaders as a “bunch of mean coke heads and bitches with shitty lives”. I know lots and lots (and I do mean lots) of gay community leaders who fit not a single part of that description. On the contrary, they’re good, big-hearted people who, in many cases, work tirelessly (many in a volunteer capacity) on behalf of our community. Sure, there are a few bad apples, but they don’t represent the group.
Likewise, I lived for 12 years in San Francisco and for 11 years now in Palm Springs. Both qualify as “gay destinations” and both have been fantastic for long-term living. Gay men and drama exist everywhere; these environments aren’t exclusive to “gay destinations”. If you’re ready to leave Palm Springs after a week, maybe it’s the heat. Or maybe you’re just hanging out with the wrong people.
You make some valid points (albeit with a rather heavy hand) about personal power and responsibility. But, you lose me when you generalize and presume to paint a whole group (or location) with a single brushstroke.
Peace.
Scott, I agree. In the smaller cities here in the Midwest and many other depressed places of the rust belts. The local gay scene is still the “bar” and that lends its self to a select few who always are in the way of the majority. In my opinion. Here the bias and graft is very obvious. I stand my ground on the comment. In the small cities it can and often is a brutal gay community. Either you are “one of the “beautiful people” or “not.” Then the many agendas take over. Many not in the interests of a lot of the gay community. What drown that out is the selflessness of the people I have worked with in these same cities over the years. In such a city I lived the early years AIDS crisis. Taking turns to drive 3-4 hours to a doctor who would at least care for them. I still think Liz Taylor should be made a saint. She did what we were trying to do, educate.
Finding shelter, food and resources. Getting the population educated is and was a full time job. While the bar owners locally counted their shekels and people died. Fund raisers for only the charity they got graft from. It was not the big norm. But, I saw it often enough. Many of these sad sacks are still running around. Parasites on us all. A lot of that has been cleaned up and the laws have gotten better. So has awareness. MY love to everyone who is a positive member of the gay/trans and all community. Most of you will never get any thanks. Bubba’s here is my thanks to you. Thank you for your dignity and courage. It was not ever easy or at times safe, thank you all. Now, for you parasites,………….I have not forgotten and never will,………
In many ways it was very different on the coasts and big cities. In a small town or city there are often very few options. The same faces often. You live on the west coast. It was and is a different game. I know. I have now lived in the major regions of the country. Don’t forget that. I assume you will live in Portland next??? If so, Give the Sisters Of Perpetual Indulgence a big sloppy kiss. Sister Goldie is my favorite. She hails from PS. Smart and looks good in a dress, or nothing at all. Grrrrrrrr Now that’s a bear to know.
I grew up in Minnesota, in a very small town of 810 people.
I lived in Minneapolis through most of the 1980s, and relocated to San Francisco in 1989. While I lived in San Francisco, I traveled frequently throughout the country for my job, meeting and working with people from all different backgrounds, economic situations, and in towns from a few thousand to cities with millions of residents. Like yours, my perspective spans the spectrum of small-town to gay meccas.
BigDan, I agree with Scott in that you make some valid points, but you have no basis for making statements like “get a backbone” and “get a shrink”. You don’t know me. I am not a wreck nor am I powerless. Fortunately I can take what seems applicable from your reply and ignore the rest. After all, it is just your opinion.
Exactly bubba. It is only an opinion. Think about it. Looks like you are on the mend.
Thanks to everybody for your comments on this blog.
This is the sort of discussion I was hoping to initiate. We don’t discuss these issues enough in our community, and I think any sort of dialogue where we get to exchange stories, ideas and perspectives is a good thing.
Nobody here is a racist or a victim. We’re all equal. And we’re all part of this “thing” we call the Bear Community.
So let’s talk it out, share our lives, and love each other.
xoxoxoxo
Oh Scott! Come here and hug me ya big lug!
OK
Scott thanks for bring this topic to the forbut now that we have talked about it,WHAT do we do about it now????
I feel by talking about it, we are doing something about it. These issues don’t get discussed enough in our community. So creating a forum where questions like this can be asked and everybody gets their say is a great thing. We all grow and learn. I’ve learned from just reading the comments on this post, and my eyes have been open to other perspectives I might not earlier have considered.
Quite frankly I think everyone needs to be a lot more concerned about the real issues. The “gay” community run by a bunch of bitchy fags. Fuck off with that. Get a backbone fellas and push the envelope a bit. I demand my rights every day. If I feel I am being discriminated I stand back. Look at the situation. Then take action. I closed down a gas station for a whole day once. Because she would NOT sell gas to a faggot. God, I broke the place up. I am a little more calm these days. I am not afraid. I realize that not every one is that strong. I got your back. However, maybe you can pester your local state and federal reps to vote better. Not just on gay issues. Mens health. Poverty. Taxes. Better schools, they deserve it. A whole list of things to work on. It is better to be part of the world than to hide from it. Get a backbone. Be part of the world.
How many of you know who your city or county elected are? Do you know how you are charged by your utilities and why? Yes, it is under gov control. The state and federal elected officials? They have to listen to you. Education and having a back bone goes a long way. Get active in a spiritual or religious group. Leave the sex and all the drama at the door. It is about personal growth. There you will find like minds. I am a Militant Quaker. I am not afraid.
In this country you have the right to live your life the way you see fit. Then do it. The cost is that you have to be a part of it. Push the envelope and demand your rights. To all perceived minority groups. You have a harder road. You all are meaner to each other than any outside influence can be. Same with fags. Then do not encourage old world ways and the cultural inbreeding our society has somehow rubber stamped in the name of fucking political correctness. I will use one of my favorite cites as an example. Detroit. Its a tough place. I love Detroit. If the population went to city hall tomorrow and demanded the ouster of all the corrupt officials, and demanded the criminal element be destroyed, it would be the greatest city in the USA in a very short time. Unlike the rest of the bitches, I am staying in Michigan. I am not giving up.
We all have choices.
I am hearing a lot of hurt here guys. I love you. Most importantly you must love your self. You have the power. Then use it. Get clean, get sober, lick your wounds and learn. Move forward. I can lend a helping hand. Anyone can. It is you that must do it. When I get depressed its hard. But I have to move. I have lost a lot of battles. I have lost more than most of you will have in many lifetimes. But I go forward. So must you. For love, for country, for family, for community and for your self.
See you at the gay pride parade. I will be carrying the American flag, the one my immigrant outcast family has died for. Not some rag. One flag one people.
I enjoyed your comments, BigDan. Do you think you can beat Obama in the general election?
My lawd Scott… you really set the fields on fire with this one! lol Congrats!
No, lol. Four years ago I worked on his election in Benton Harbor, MI. I was this big, hairy, scary, white guy working against the clock to get the people of Benton Harbor to the polls. A 90% black city. My beard was at least 12 inches long. I was in places the police would not go. Getting people to the polls. So many old and infirm needed help to get there. We worked the doors also. Getting out the word. I was so proud of my fellow citizens. We worked hard. His speech that night gave a lot of us hope at headquarters. A lot of hope to many of the hungry in the city. A population convinced they were powerless. No, I like to state the obvious. I am too direct. I could never be President. I work too hard. Thanks for the compliment Scott.
Yes, there are bigger issues to talk about and deal with. I think we all realize that. But this is an important issue, too. Just because ethnic diversity in the bear community isn’t the top story on CNN doesn’t mean it doesn’t matter to folks here on BearCentral.
So, mindful that there are a million pressing issues we could talk about, I have an idea: Let’s talk about ethnic diversity and inclusion in the bear community for now, and we’ll tackle some of the other issues facing us all, in the coming days.
Great topic!
It’s obvious we all need some healing as evidenced by the pains caused by racism and inequality that are still very real. In my opinion, a ‘bear’ is a disposition and attitude more so than a race, specific body type, or abundance of body hair. If we could just break it down and accept we’re all formed from the remnants of exploding stars evolving to wonder Africa, and beyond; perhaps, we’ll heal what’s under our differing skin pigments?
Bear Magazine is responsible for it’s own content so expand your own horizons and inclusions to reflect the broadening definition of what a ‘bear’ is. Pleasantly surprise us with a variety a beautiful men to gawk over, and thanks for opening a can of worms. : )
Love to all you beautiful bears!!!
Amen!
I am sorry. I was to broad. I guess I need a diet. Racial harmony? I hope so. I see some but I do have great hopes. Men are flawed. Period. Gawd knows I am. Everyone has a soap box and they think theirs is the only one. Yea, that’s you too.
Now for the good stuff. We are all one race. Like dogs we can breed and interbreed. WE are all human. Now, I swear a few of the fags/queens/my mother at the bar may be reptiles? Anything is possible. I will leave that to any of the many conspiratorial sites and YouTube. Always good to ponder on.
I assume you are human? Good. Now lets talk culture. Culture is self imposed learning. You learn culture. This is science based fact. So I think we all need to get over our individual cultures. Play nice and act like men. It is in your heads. Nothing more.
Good luck on that one.
What we need are good roll models who will push the issues. Break down the barrier of the “Down Low” end the mass media stereo type of the “non white gay” as a drag queen, hooker and or drug user. Loud mouthy and non dignified. Quite frankly I had hoped Mr President would have been more vocal and more accepting of the gay community in general. Especially to bring education and light into a black/hispanic/immigrant community ravaged by its own self hate. To call out the churches that scream hate the fags! Many of the churches would burn us alive in our homes if they could get away with it. Demand the leaders of these communities lead with positive acceptance. Stop bringing all of us down.
I want to see big hairy men of all colors. All sizes and all whatsoever. The greatest strength of the “bear” world is that we are the norm of man. Color is just a shade of pigment. We get lost in self definition. The “bear” heading is men who have hair and have some weight. In an obese society this is the norm. As most men get older they basically get fat, hairy and in my case kranky. We need to capitalize on this. Stop bickering about who is a bear. For god sake, it reminds me of the queens in SF arguing about hankie colors. Give us all a break. Get real. Look to the men coming up. I see a lot of strong men coming up in the ranks. Like the people of their generation they are strong. They are totally about who they are. These men will come new non stereotypes of gay man. Black is the new sexy. It always was. So is all the men. Like many of you men reading this. You were the first out gay couple in your suburban neighborhood. I remember buying the big house above the beach. We broke ground that day. The first out gay couple in a very conservative small town. With a 22 year age difference between us. With some nudging and some of us showing the way, new leaders will come out. It is them I look to see a new leadership. Bear, is a general heading and should be kept so. Soon, a lot of black/white/hispanic/whatever self definition of race will be coming up. Also coming out. They are aging nicely. Getting bigger and more hairy by the day. Look past your baby boomer noses We are all men. Except Jessica who serves a mean cocktail down at the bar, and she looks great since the boob job. We are in a flux between generational tides to say the least.
Bear. Bear is self definition. It is redefining its self by the day. In five years it will be very, very different. I see an new group emerging. You have no idea of what is about to happen. Anyway, thank god the hankie thing is over. Such a childish game.
I’m just… and… so… well, good. There it is.
Its amazing how stupid I can get.
I agree. We all have our own form of a soapbox, and I think hanky codes are for those without an imagination. Before I even knew what a bear was, I was attracted to the handsome men I played sports with, and that is my barometer for what sexy is today. To this day I am attracted to men of all skin tones.
I judge people… but I digress because the question was about the visibility of people of color in bear circles. Perhaps I need to reread The Invisible Man?
Thanks again Scott for breaching the topic, and Dan for stirring the pot.
Dan, may I lick your spoon??
I used to run a queer organization at my college and we struggled. We were a very open organization, we even had a few members of color, but we were overwhelmingly white. I am glad to see this discussion happening, but the original post did sound a little bit like “Well, we tried, and they just didn’t want to come.” Trying to incorporate racial and ethnic diversity is not something a group can do passively, it has to be an active pursuit. Want more models of color for a magazine? Put out a casting call SPECIFICALLY for bears of color. Or even just add a note at the end “men of color encouraged to apply.” It’s important to realize that in this pursuit, you will make mistakes, and it’s important to own up to your privileges and ignorance and listen to what people of color are telling you that they want to see and to always keep learning. At the same time, don’t ever expect that minorities exist solely to educate you on how to be a good ally. Google is great for that!
Ryan – that was not the intention of this post. Yes, we did try, repeatedly, to encourage men of color to audition for the magazines. But, again – magazines and videos aren’t the only aspects of the Bear Community where ethnic diversity is lacking. I don’t know that anybody’s suggested that minorities exist solely to educate others on how to be a good ally, have they?
As for specifying “men of color encouraged to apply” in our recruitment efforts – no, we did not do that, as I remember. And for good reason. When we said, “We’re looking for all sexy men of all ages, races, shapes and sizes…” – all men (including men of color) are included in that.
I refused to single out certain ethnicities and coddle them with, “by the way… you… we especially want you, because you’re black (or latino or asian, or middle-easern).”
We weren’t trying to fill an ethnic quota; we were simply looking to feature the diversity which exists (or should exist) in our community.
Hope that clears things up for you.
I have to also add I really hope the Latino community and by extension all communities/people of color continue to make progress in terms of being open and accepting of LGBTQ men and women so that we can be free and more comfortable in/with our respective gay communities and identities. Conversations like these are helpful. Thanks for posting about this, Scott.
We need to encourage all men to be out and proud. To people of “whatever” group. Use a backbone and push the issue. Get over your race and color. So everyone else can.
Some people’s “backbones” are more pronounced than others, but in the end I think we’re all trying for the same thing, bigdanbear. I personally don’t want and won’t ever to “get over” my race and color. The same way I don’t want and won’t ever get over my sexuality. It is what it is and I’m learning to love it and myself as is.
Regarding the original post, it seems to be changing, if slowly. We noticed more bears of color at bear week 2011 than ever. And they were hot!
That’s great news. The more the merrier! Plus, I think forums like this which encourage the idea of talking openly about racial diversity helps to break down barriers as well.
i think you all have a good point, many good points, i grew up in a small town in SE Michigan there were very few ethnic differences mostly white but we had one black family in our town they the best friends i have ever had i never had a problem with the color of there skin on the inside they were just like me when i went to work in the shop i had the opportunity to work beside many different skin colors there was nothing different in them than what was in me except the color of their skin, i made many friends and still cherish the friendships wheather you be black,asian,chinese,japanese,philipino,middle eastern, it doesnt matter we we were all created in the image of our creator and for that reason alone we need to love and embrace the difference that all of us have and learn to live together in peace and harmony and that is my 2 cents
I’ve been interested in bears for about 6 years now, my first outing being Bear Bust last year in Orlando. There were about three chocolate chips in a sea of vanilla… but we were accepted. What I had to learn was that skin tone doesnt define you as a bear as much as having a dick defines you as a man. It’s our imperfections that make us who we are. “Well that sounds fairly rude. What in the hell does he mean by that?”
The media archetype for a gay make is generally one who is well groomed, well coiffed,and a dainty little thing that would fall apart like a souffle if you looked at him wrong. Bears on the other hand balk that way of thinking and are the exact opposite of this. THIS is what I love about identifying as a cub, that I dont have to chase labels, be frilly, or spend hours in the mirror looking for a perfection that doesnt exist. I can be me; plain ole hairy me and still be accepted.
Absolutely, Lloyd!